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02/21/2007: "Ecce Homo, ergo Sanguinus"

Take a chimp, stand him up on his hind legs, swell his brain until he's just smart enough to ask metaphysical questions he'll never be able to answer, just clever enough to make weapons but dull enough to turn them on his brother, shave off most of the hair, move the larynx up and forward, and before you know it, you have a man with chronic headaches, low back pain, thrombosed hemeroids, bum knees and hips, painful feat, a tendency to prattle endlessly about anything and nothing while having a hard time not choking on his food or catching pneumonia, and a knack for depression, ennui, alianation, mendacity, self-destruction and bloody religious fervor.